I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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