Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
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I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
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We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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