Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
operation have a gay friend backfired
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
