I am in a vortex of obligation.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Randomize
