we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize