yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
