I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize