I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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