you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
