Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
