Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I smell stomach acid.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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