I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize