i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
you would pick up someone in the library
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
