Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
