Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
