just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
