So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
