Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
My vagina just recognized that song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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