Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
