piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Randomize
