I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
