At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Bang-toberfest begins!!
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
