im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize