Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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