Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
