Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize