Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
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