another moral hangover. fuck.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Randomize
