i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
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