His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize