I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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