Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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