Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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