Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize