The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
