i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
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