I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Randomize
