There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
