they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
