For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
