is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Randomize
