The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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