So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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