i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
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