You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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