My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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