hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
