Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
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