So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Girls should come with a carfax report
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Of course I have a pirate flag
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
