Are you dead
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.