You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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