so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
