never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
